Julia met Macy at prom. She'd gone with a friend who needed a date and Julia zeroed in on her right away. She was compact and thick in all the right places. Perfect round ass, perky C cups. A little pudgy, but just a gorgeous girl all dressed up at prom. She looked stunning with that white silky dress clinging to her curves, white heels. The pearl choker around her neck was what caught Julia's eye, a matching bracelet and anklet. She had a pretty face, fine features, just as cute as ever. Her hair at the dance had been braided, hanging midway down her back. Olive smooth skin.
Macy was only supposed to be a fuck toy. One night post prom, in a hotel room. Julia snatched her away from the friend-prom date and didn't let her go. They did lines in the bathroom at the hotel, made the senior prom a party, then fucked her afterward. More lines, more vodka, more condoms cause she was so fine Chess had her too.
After prom they talked on and off, met a few times for coffee, got to know each other a little as friends. She'd just turned 19, graduating in June and heading to college in the fall. She was single. Dressed like a normal girl in jeans and a tee with her converse hi tops on, glasses on, hair up in a bun she had a geek chic thing going on. Plus she was smart and sweet and could hold a conversation. She indulged Julia's plans, the new dream for when the infection returned. Julia hadn't told her about the last one, kept all that important nonsense to herself. But the future plans, plans to combat the walking dead, Macy was more than interested. Coffee dates led to hanging out either at Julia's house, Chess's house or Macy's apartment where she lived with her dad. Macy's mom had died when she was young, which was another commonality that they shared.
Julia was falling for her. Admitting that was difficult. Chess watched it go down, saw Jesslyn happening all over again. He wasn't sure whether to be grateful or dismissive of her love affair with Macy. He liked Macy, himself. She was all those things that Julia said she was. He needed to know whether Macy was going to be an add on, their third wheel? She definitely didn't get on his nerves. He could talk to her, hang out with her. He liked her wearing her clothes as much as he liked her without her clothes. She was a totally chill girl.
"Julia, what are we doing with Macy?" He asked one night after Macy fell off to sleep. Not like Macy was a puppy, they couldn't exactly keep the girl although training her was fun. She wasn't as experienced with guys as she was girls.
"Whatever we want I guess." Julia answered.
"I'm being serious, Julia. She's been hanging around a lot. What are we doing?"
"Does she bother you?"
"No, the opposite." He said, trying to cover up Macy with the blanket.
Julia stopped him, "Don't. I like looking at her."
"Julia, where do you see this going?"
"Chess, I'm liking her a lot, but to look into the future. I don't know."
"Cause I think, and don't get mad, she's into me."
"I know she is. She told me." Julia informed him. "Did you do anything with her I need to know about? Are you into her like that?"
"I could see it happening in the future, if you keep her around. I like her, Julia, as a person not just to sleep with her. But that's dangerous, Julia. She's pretty cool and if I didn't have you around, like if we weren't where we are, I could date her. Do you see where I am going with this?"
"Chess, you wanna wife her? Are you falling for her?"
"We are at a place with Macy, that if you stop it now, I could keep it from happening."
"Chess, do you have feelings for Macy?"
"Yes. So, you need to make a decision here. You can stop this or you can risk this. What you're thinking, Julia, I am right there with you. I know exactly how you feel."
"Wow, Chess, you could have told me."
"I'm telling you now." He said, pulling her close to him. "I feel with her the way I felt with you when we first started really talking to each other."
"Shit, Chess." Julia whined.
"Do you want this?" Chess asked. "Can you handle me getting close to her?"
"Close like me and you close? Like the love making, die for each other close?"
"I'm not dying for her yet. I'm not close to love yet, but Julia this is how that starts. I could appreciate this girl around me more. I wanna spend more time with her?"
"Oh, that's what you're thinking?"
"That's why I am asking you. Julia. Are you even listening to me? That's why I brought it up."
"Chess, you do realize I don't come second to anyone else."
"I do. It's easy to say to you now. And I could see you as equals one day. Not first or second, as equals." He said.
"An equal? Did you just qualify someone as my equal? How? You don't know her like that yet."
"I started to, just like you have."
"I see. It's easy to do. I'll give you that much."
"You went and found a girl. Thanks. This is what happens when you make friends with your girl, when I make friends with your girl. She's turning into our girl, Julia."
Julia sat up in bed, pulling on her tee shirt and panties.
"Are you mad at me, Julia?"
"No, why? I understand. I'm glad you told me."
"Where are you going then?"
"Out to smoke."
"So what are we doing? With the girl?"
"If you like her that much, my Chess, then you tell me."
"Are you being a sarcastic bitch or giving me an answer?"
"Chess, both. Baby, what's your gut say?"
Post graduation, the party was at Chess's house. Friends, family, music, food, a party tent had been set up. Chess's dad had set up one of those cheap pools that he got from the Walmart and got it running, so there were people jumping in and out of the water. People came and went for hours on end. Sandy spent the day setting up the yard and Julia helped with decorations. Julia hated balloons, but they were everywhere, red and black, the school colors. It was as much a celebration for Sandy and John as the three graduates in the family because this graduation marked the end. They were finally done with raising kids.
Macy's dad dropped her off after her own graduation. Julia had blown up some red and white balloons and attached them to her chair, Mav East's colors. They'd invited her dad, Ruben, into the party as well and he sat with the friends and family and met the parents of Macy's new friends. He sat his handsome self with Cal and Ellen, John and Sandy and fit right in. He was quintessential tall, dark and handsome. Fit, he worked out regularly. Black hair, dark brown eyes, muscular and slim. Macy's dad was hot and a hit with the family.
"Is that your girl?" Tavin asked Julia, watching Macy prance around in her two piece, a hot pink swim shirt and bikini bottom, a sarong wrapped around her waist. Her belly button ring reflecting the sun light.
"That's Macy." Julia smiled.
"No, how'd you score that fine piece?"
"Power of the tongue, Tavin. Ain't she pretty?"
"Pretty. Beyond it, Red. I'm about to cheat on my girl over here. I'll be back." Tavin said, heading directly toward her.
Julia started handing out drinks over the table to anyone who stepped up. She watched Tavin from a far. Chess stepped in beside her.
"You know we can get our own drinks." He pointed out. He looked across the yard. "What's he doing?"
"Cheating on Kelly." She answered.
"Uh, that's Mace." Chess pointed out feeling a little anger creep up.
"I know. I wanna see what happens. He's so hard to turn down, Chess." Julia said, sipping her punch.
"Is he really-"
"Oh, yeah. He's really going in." Julia replied. "He used to do that to me. He works his way in closer and closer." Julia said, feeling the buzzing around in her belly. Just remembering him getting closer stirred up stuff she hadn't thought about in a long time. "He's fast. See the hands?"
"Julia, I don't like this." Chess protested.
"Are you worried? Really? Chess, baby, I am not worried about this."
"Why?"
"Cause I lick better and you have a bigger dick, throw in some feelings...we're ok, Chess."
"I will fuck him up, Julia."
"His hand's on her shoulder, watch. He's going for the waist. When he gets to the ass, she'll stop him. She's not uncomfortable yet. She's flirting."
"She's not allowed to flirt."
"Well, Chess, you need to talk to her. I told you that you could. She's who you want." Julia said, reassuring him. He had been hesitant about doing it even though it's what he desired to do. Tavin's hand covered her ass, ever so lightly. Macy turned her body away. "Told you." She said, taking Chess's hand. She leaned in and kissed Chess's cheek. "Told you so."
Julia left him to fetch Macy, gave her a hug, a kiss on her cheek. Purposefully grabbed her ass in front of Tavin. "Mace, you met Tavin I see."
"He just hit on me." Macy said.
"You blame him?" Julia smiled. "Hey, did you bring it?"
"I did." She said, glaring at Tavin.
"Hey, if you change your mind..." Tavin offered.
"Jerk," Macy said.
"Come on, let's go."
She and Macy went in the basement and in the bathroom where they did lines. "I love this shit." Julia said, inhaling the white powder into her nostril.
"You got the Xanax? For later? I'd like to come down."
"Yeah. A script from my shrink. I told him I was all nerves since school was ending and I was having issues dealing with life. I really prefer coke."
"What was up with Tavin?"
"Come here." Julia said, pulling her body close. Julia reached into her bikini bottoms and slipped her fingers inside her. "That's what's up with Tavin. Thanks for turning him down, baby."
"I wouldn't go there with him." Macy said, putting her arms around her neck. She kissed Julia as Julia's fingers brought her to a fast orgasm.
"Chess thanks you too." Julia said in her ear.
"He doesn't have to worry about me." Macy said softly as she trembled slightly. Her legs were weak. "I want this to work, Julia." Macy said, kissing her neck in that spot that Chess loved to kiss.
"Best of both worlds." Julia said, cocking her neck to the side to give her room to kiss and lick her.
"Have you talked to Chess about moving?" She asked, dropping the sarong from her waist. Julia knelt in front of her on the bathroom floor.
"Not yet. I don't think it will be a problem. I can go to school anywhere and he, well, he can live anywhere." She answered, slipping the bikini bottoms aside, kissing her where she'd exposed her, dipping her tongue inside her wetness. When she had Macy good and ready, dripping into Julia's mouth, she separated. "Want me to send him in here, Macy, baby?"
"Please," She said, breathing heavily.
Julia left her in the bathroom, went to find Chess who was with his brother and his friends, eating a hot dog. Julia whispered in his ear, told him to get Macy. "She's ready, Chess." She said, taking the hot dog from him. Chess sprinted to the basement.
Julia almost finished the hot dog when she spied Tavin across the tent with Kelly. She walked over to them, Julia said hi to Kelly then sat on Tavin's lap, hugging him. "Sniff." She teased in his ear. She felt and heard him inhaling. Julia turned to Kelly and finished Chess's hot dog, having a full conversation with Tavin hard beneath her ass. Below the table, Tavin's hand moved up Julia's thigh closer and closer to her bikini line. She let him play with the seam, lift it, his fingers twisting her hair and tugging it a bit. Should have trimmed up, Julia thought, swatting his hand away.
"Hey, you mean what you said to me?"
"I do, Mace. When I say I got you, I got you. I don't play with feelings. We have to be honest or we have nothing."
"I'm just scared of getting hurt again. I told you what-."
"I will never lay my hand on you."
Macy...she was as broken as Julia. How'd he wind up with them? Was every girl broken by someone? Scarred.
"Hey, this is a party. Let's go out and have some fun."
"Ok. I'd like that."
"You should get to know them. They'll like you."
"My dad's here. I don't want my dad-"
"He won't. We're all friends here."
Chess followed Macy outside, she met everyone and started talking and having fun.
Chess went for Tavin, asked him to come with him and he went. He led Tavin around the tent to the back of the yard and when he was in the clear of the adults at the party, he threw a right hook and snagged Tavin directly on his eye. "That was for Macy." It kind of surprised him, the strength Chess had as he stumbled back. He hit him again, this time knocking him to the ground. "That's for Kelly." Chess yelled at him.
"Ok, Chess, I got it. Damn." Tavin said, looking up at him from the ground.
"You don't go out on Kelly. The fuck is wrong with you?" Chess yelled. He held out his hand, waited for him to take it, then yanked him to his feet.
"Fuck you, Chess." Tavin said, holding his eye.
Chess walked away. Back to Julia. Back to the party.
"Why's there always gotta be a fight?" Sandy complained when she saw Chess and Tavin walking back together under the tent. "Should I ask?"
"No." Chess said flatly as he passed. All those balloons, he observed. They were everywhere. Julia hated balloons. He hadn't figured out why. "Mom, I asked you not to do the balloon thing so heavy. Julia hates balloons."
"She helped me with them. Didn't say anything." Sandy called as Chess sat at the table directly behind hers. Tavin scooped some ice into a cup and held it against his head. He sat at the table beside Kelly holding it against his eye, which was throbbing.
"She hates balloons." Cal agreed. "She almost choked to death on one. She couldn't have been more than a year and half, two years old. She was chewing on one. Almost died on us."
"Dad, is that why I hate balloons?"
"I guess. You were blue. Couldn't breathe." Cal said. "Your mom was devastated. You must have been two. It was around your birthday."
"Well, that explains it then." Julia said.
"Almost as scary as when you were shot." He said, volunteering information that had been a private and distant past. He'd said it without thinking and the mood at Julia's table shifted violently, remembering. They all remembered. Julia's heart nearly stopped.
"Shot? Cal? When was she ever shot?" Ellen laughed.
"I remember that. Jayson shot me in the head with the BB gun. It was more blood than anything. Right, dad?"
Cal was caught off guard, realizing what he'd said. "Yeah, the BB gun."
Jay suddenly excused himself, leaving the table and walking away. Why'd Cal do that? Drudge up that memory he hadn't had in a long time. He'd nearly forgotten that. Julia and Kelly fixed that. He didn't do that. It never happened, but it bothered him.
They sat still, the lot of them. "I'll go." Julia whined, rolling her eyes. She stood up and followed Jay out front of the house. She found him on the front steps.
"You alright, Jay?"
"Yeah." He answered. "Wow, I can't believe your dad said that. I haven't thought about it. I never think about it."
"Well, don't waste time on it now, Jay. Please."
"I know. It just hit me. It all came back."
"I'm right here, Jay. Look. I'm alive and so are you. We're all fine."
"I see. I know."
"Cal slipped. It wasn't on purpose." She said, taking a seat on the step next to him.
"All the blood."
"A lot of blood that isn't there anymore. We're all alright. We're here, we're happy, we're all graduated. It's only a memory."
"They're all thinking about it now."
"And they will stop thinking about it."
"What if it didn't work?"
"We'd be on our farm, zombie slaying and watching corn grow. Either way, either life, Jay...it doesn't matter."
Jay stood up when he was ready to head back to the party. Julia walked with him. "You miss it don't you?"
"Between me and you, Jayson. I do."
"Between you and me, I miss it too. I knew what I was doing there. It was black and white, No gray in the middle. Here..." He paused. "You think it'll happen again? That the infection, for real?"
"It's speculation, Jayson. That's all it is."
"Can we do it all over again? When it happens? Does your plan include all of us?"
"Jay, no one likes me talking about it."
"Do you have a plan, Julia?" He asked, stopping her at the gate.
"Yeah, Jay. It'll all be ok. It's a rough draft, it'll need everyone's input, but yes. I do. We start all over from scratch."
He opened the gate and held it for her.
She and Jay returned to the table, sat and hung out.
"What are you all planning on doing?" Cal asked. "You grads?"
"Nursing school." Julia answered.
"I'm not doing anything." Chess answered.
Ray was heading to college, going to join a frat and party.
Jay was going to college, but staying local, moving in with Tavin and the kids. He wanted to stay near Jess.
Cassidy was heading to New York.
"Where is Hayley?" Jay asked, picking up his phone. He texted her, asking that very question.
OMW-she replied.
"She's on her way." Jess said.
"Who's Hayley?" Macy asked.
"A friend. We haven't seen her in awhile."
"I saw her at graduation. You guys know Kevin's here right?" Tavin said.
"No, is he?" Julia asked. "I didn't know."
"He didn't bring his crew with him did he?" Chess asked.
"I didn't see anybody, no."
"What did her parents say?" Julia laughed. "Wow, do they know? Did they meet him?"
"Kevin from Philly?" Cal asked.
"Yeah, dad."
"He's a street thug isn't he?" Cal stated.
"You don't know Kevin, dad." Julia said, defending him. "Hey, is he gonna be able to get out here ok?"
"Why wouldn't he?" Sandy asked.
"I think so." Tavin replied. "Julia, he'll be alright."
"He's used to having people help him. He doesn't think they do, but they do."
"Help him with what?" Sandy asked.
"Hay's friend, he's in a wheel chair." Tavin said.
"Why?" Sandy asked.
"He got shot, mom." Chess answered.
"I wish she said something. When did he get here?"
"He drove up this morning. He wanted to be here for her."
"Awe, he's sweet." She said. "Hey, she better have some clothes on." Julia whispered to Chess. "She can't walk around like-you know."
"Oh, this is gonna get fun." Chess grinned.
"No heels. Please, God. No heels."
"Nah, not here. She knows better." Chess said.
"Who shot him? Is he in jail?" Sandy asked.
"Don't know, mom. Never asked." Chess lied.
Hayley and Kevin showed up shortly after the text. Kevin had a special van he drove, which he never brought out in Philly. He never had to drive in the city, but for a solo trip like this, he'd brought out his handicap van. In the city, he rode in his chair or with T. Kevin blended into the party, greeted everyone, met the parents. He wasn't what the family expected. Their version of street thug was from the news and Kevin didn't fit that description. They made room for him at the table and Hayley made room on his lap. She was dressed modestly, in a one piece suit and a sheer sarong similar to Macy's. She took off her sunglasses and set them on the table.
Alex and Tatia came over and said hi. Tatia pushed Hayley off him and climbed into the chair on his lap. She asked for a ride. Hayley stood beside Tavin and pulled up a chair of her own.
"A ride?" He smiled.
"Like Julia used to ride me on her lap." Tatia said, bringing Jay right back to the place he'd been in his head earlier. Funny what the kids remembered and didn't remember. It's like they chose to remember the fond memories and discard the bad ones.
"Hayley, get my bag. Give it to Julia." He instructed as he wheeled away from the table with Tatia on his lap.
Hayley tossed Julia the bag and watched her a s she rummaged through it. Weed and vodka. A separate brown bag for Chess.
"I'm leaving." Hayley announced to them.
"You just got here, Hayley."
"No, like I am leaving with Kevin. After the party. Are you guys coming? You're totally welcome." Hayley said, looking hopeful they may consider it.
"No, Hay." Chess answered, shaking his head. "We could visit, but that's about it."
"You're leaving? Just like that?"
"It's what I planned on doing, yes. I have school lined up in Philly. He's going to put me through school. We're gonna have a life one day that's legit, Julia."
"That's great, babe." Julia smiled. "You guys deserve that."
"Be careful, Hay. You sure about this."
"I will be ok. You're not the only one with a plan, Jules."
"Sure, great. You do what makes you happy."
"Who's this?" Hayley asked as Macy came into view.
"A friend. Mace, this is Hayley."
Hayley's feathers were ruffled as she looked over Macy's thick frame. "New girl?" Hayley asked.
"Hi," Macy looked over Hayley's thick frame. She could feel the tension at the table.
"Jules, are all your sex partners here now?" Tavin joked.
Julia was mortified, though glancing around the table, she thought the bases were all covered. "Tavin, what is your problem today?" Julia asked.
"I don't have a problem today, Red."
"Quit picking on me, then." She glared. "Are you having a moment? Do you need a meeting?" She asked bluntly.
"I think so." Kelly added, holding Tavin's hand. "He's having a tough time with all these changes."
"Kell," Tavin said, looking at her. His eyes told her to stop, shut up.
"The house, moving them in, school, work. Me and my family. He's just all over the map, moody and-"
"Kelly, why are you-"
"Tavin, I'm tired of dealing with you all by myself."
"Well, don't deal with me then."
"So he wants to use?" Jay asked.
"What would you like to use, Tavin? We probably have something-" Macy asked.
"Macy, I know we just met, but that's not cool." Kelly said.
"He's an addict." Jay said to her.
"You know what?" Julia groaned. She slid her bottle of vodka across the table to him. "You're not an alcoholic, so drink."
He slid the bottle back to her. "One thing leads to another." He grumbled.
"Go on. It's a party. Get it out of your system." Julia said, sliding it back.
Tavin slid it back. Why'd she have to weaken him? Julia opened the bottle and poured out shots in their empty cups. "On three, kids. 1...2...3..." They all slammed the shots. "Again, cups please." Julia said, pouring their next shot. Jay was still gagging on the first shot. He never was much of a drinker. "The alcoholic says on three. 1...2...3..."
Jay waved his hand and pulled his cup away. "No more." He complained. "Uh, it's nasty, Julia."
"What are you drinking?" Sandy asked, noticing them doing shots.
"Vodka." Julia replied, stepping to the table and pouring some in her cup. "Drink responsibly." Julia told her.
As the table cleared out, half in the pool, half finding other shit to do, Julia sat with Tavin and they worked on emptying the bottle of vodka.
Tavin started feeling good and loosened up. "Still wanna get high." He admitted.
"Tavin, everything's gonna work out. You gotta lean on us."
"You wouldn't understand this." He said.
"So, I can try. I can listen. I can-"
"Shut up. Can you shut up?"
"No." She replied, pouring Tavin's shot. "Cause I love you."
"I love you too." He said. "What else is in that bag?"
"Weed and coke. I got Xanax." Julia answered.
"Oxy?"
"Umm, I don't- No, Tav."
"Perc's. Do you have any percs?" He demanded.
"Maybe? Macy does pills, babe. I don't." She said. "Why you feeling like this? You're doing a great job, Tav. You got nothing to worry about."
"Jules, I fucked up. I need to get high."
"You already did it, didn't you? What are you on?"
"Julia, I am so fucked up. Work..."
"You took drugs from work?"
"Morphine."
"No."
"Yes." He answered.
"You can ruin your whole life, Tavin. Your job? Your home? Your family? Tavin, you just fucking got your job. Are you out of your mind?"
"Not my finest moment. Believe me." He admitted.
"Don't steal your shit from work. You could lose everything."
"I know this."
"Why?"
"It was there...unaccounted for. I'm in and out of the ER all the time."
Julia sat silently for a minute. "So what are you going to do? Can you stop or do you need help or-"
"I feel like shit. Kell doesn't know what's going on. She thinks I'm cheating on her."
"Are you?"
He didn't answer.
"Tavin, no. Who is she?"
"A nurse, Gabby. She uses too. We were partying, using."
"Tavin Keller." Julia muttered, tears forming in her eyes. Julia's heart was breaking.
"It's how it starts, Julia. The access. You find people that have the same needs, one thing leads to another..."
"Shit, Tavin."
"I don't love her. I don't even like her. Gabby."
"So, what do we do about this?"Julia said, processing all that he'd confessed.
"Another shot?" He suggested, taking the bottle of vodka from her. He poured them more vodka. "How am I supposed to have them there and live like this?" He asked, then downed the shot.
"You can't." Julia replied, then took her shot. "Is that why? Is this your way of keeping it from happening? Making sure it doesn't happen?"
"I'm alone, Red."
"No, you're not. We're all right here. You're so far from alone. You just don't see it."
"Coke, then." Tavin said, standing up.
Julia and Tavin went out of the tent and to the basement, through the darkness and to the bathroom. Julia shut and locked the door and set out the lines. Heavily intoxicated and inhaling drugs with her addict.
"Clean yourself up in the morning, Tavin. Whatever you have to do, pull it together."
"In the morning." He said, closing the lid on the toilet. He sat down. He watched Julia get high, snorting the last line from the counter top.
"We're fucked up, Tav." She said, feeling the coke set her blood on fire.
"Come here." He said, pulling her waist and setting her on top of him.
"Tav, what the-?" She laughed, setting on top of him. She could feel his hard on through his shorts. "Fuck, this is wrong." She whispered, letting him kiss her chest. She tasted like sunscreen.
"I know it's wrong." He agreed, untying her bikini top.
"Tav, we shouldn't-" She reminded him, but he felt so good on her skin, his mouth on her breasts.
He started unzipping, lifting her so he could get his dick out of his shorts. His hands tugged at her bikini bottoms, pulling them down. She allowed him.
"Wait," She breathed, pulling her rings off her finger. She reached back and set them on the edge of the sink. She could feel him entering her. Before the rings were on the counter, he was in her and on her.
"I asked you not to marry him." Tavin reminded her as he made her cum for the tenth time. "Red, wanna get outta here? It's not going down anytime soon."
"And go where? We're fucked up. We leave this room, I put my rings on and-"
"I know. Put them back on." He said, lifting her off him. She stumbled a bit, putting her bikini back on. He helped her tie the top. She placed her rings back on her finger. She stood holding onto the sink, looking in the mirror. Tavin stood behind her, his arms embracing her around her shoulders. He looked at her in the mirror, looked at himself. "What are we doing?"
"Fucking shit up as usual." She laughed. "Wanna really get out of here? Leave?"
"Don't tempt me." He said. "I asked you to think about what you were doing. I asked you to think, Julia."
"I did. I choose both, babe. Wife and slut."
"Lucky me." He grinned, running his hands over her chest to her waist, his hand dipped inside her bathing suit. His fingers started working on her again.
When the knock came on the door, they nearly jumped a foot, but Tavin continued, fingers in her.
"Julia, are you in there?" Jay asked.
"Yeah," She answered, her voice breaking up
"Sandy wants to cut this cake. Will you come on so we can get these parents out of here?"
"Ok. Coming." She answered, her body shivering as Tavin made her cum again with his hand.
"Who's in there with you, Julia?" Jayson asked, recognizing her tone of voice. He'd made her cum before.
"Umm, I'm alone." She lied.
"You're alone, huh?" He questioned her.
"Aaaahh, um, yeah." She replied. "Five minutes." She called as Tavin dropped the bikini to the floor. He pushed inside her again. "Maybe ten."
"Five, Julia. Who's in there with you?" He asked again, "Because Macy and Chess are outside."
"Go outside and keep your mouth shut. Five minutes, brother." Tavin stated.
"This is not good, guys." Jay called through the door. "This is just-"
"No, no. It's good." Tavin corrected him.
Five minutes later, Julia peeked out of the bathroom. The coast was clear and she sent Tavin upstairs to go outside through the kitchen.
"You alright?" Chess asked as she returned to the party, to cut the cake. "You were gone forever."
"Me and Tavin were doing lines, Chess." Julia whispered.
"What else were you doing?" He asked skeptically. He noticed her playing with her rings nervously, that they were on backwards.
Tavin stood on the deck and watched as they cut the cake. They handed out slices of a yellow sheet cake. When Jayson brought him a slice, he took it and started eating. "Jay, you mad at me?"
"Not exactly." Jay said. He looked around, at the people standing near them. "The cake is good isn't it?"
Tavin agreed. "Delicious. The best cake I ever had."
"You told me to stop eating the cake, put the cake down, and leave the cake alone."
"I am so high and drunk right now, Jay. So don't get mad when I say this. I should eat the whole cake. I should take the cake home and eat it there."
"Fuck the cake, Tavin. I'm eating ice cream now."
"I'm not done eating cake. I'll eat the cake whenever I want. I don't care."
"You have your own cake. You don't have to steal a slice of someone else's. Just sayin'."
"You better hope I don't get out a spoon and start eating ice cream." He laughed. Jay didn't find him very funny. "Jay, I'm kidding. I swear. I don't want any of your ice cream."
"You are a dick when you're using. I know what you're like when you use."
"I'm sorry. About the ice cream. Jay, I was really just kidding."
"This isn't funny. You're not funny. You're scaring me."
"I'll fix it, Jay. I need to come down, but I'll fix this."
"Take Julia with you. She needs to fix herself too."
"I hope you don't ever find yourself where I am, Jay. You're too good..."
Jay laughed, "Too good? I have had my days. You people are lucky you're even alive."
By nightfall, the party had dwindled down to a handful of the usual suspects with Macy added into the mix. Hayley and Kevin chose to stay and leave for Philly in the morning. In the basement with the left over alcohol and drugs, the party shifted pretty quickly. Cass had left, feeling uncomfortable. A strict non drinker, non drugger she had to leave. Ray stayed, which pissed her off and they got into an argument about more than drugs in a basement. He was pissed she chose New York instead of Texas, which was where he was heading in the fall. He refused to leave his own party or go to New York with her.
Kelly was pissed off with Tavin who was so drunk and high he couldn't drive, which meant they were stuck there. Julia heard him reassuring her, "In the morning, Kelly. I promise." Usually Tavin was a man of his word, but on this, Julia couldn't be sure.
They set up a poker game, turned up the music and sat smoking drinking and playing cards while the girls danced or hung on their guys. Tavin forced Kelly onto his lap and he showed her how to play the game. They fetched her some beer from the fridge and she loosened up. Believed Tavin when he told her no more drugs. She wanted to believe him.
"This reminds me of the farmhouse. When we would sit and play cards." Kelly said, pointing at a card in Tavin's hand. He nodded, and she discarded it for him.
"Cards was all we had to do." Chess said, looking at his hand pensively. "How you think we got so good at this?"
"What farmhouse?" Macy asked from the love seat where she cuddled with Julia.
"It was a trip we took one time." Jay answered.
"Oh, it sounds like fun."
"It was." Jay said, watching Jess play their hand.
"It was boring too. Sometimes." Julia added.
"Depended on the day, really." Chess said.
"How long were you there?" Macy asked. "All of you?"
"It was more like summer camp." Jess said. "Yes, all of us. We all have different memories of that place."
"Maybe we could do it again sometime?"
"No." Hayley said. "I wasn't having a lot of fun at camp."
"Awe, why not?" Macy asked.
"I'm not a camper. Not into the wilderness. We couldn't have our phones, no internet, no electricity. It was very basic."
"Oh, well that doesn't sound very fun."
"You had to be there." Julia said. "We were closer and happier I think."
"So you have known each other-"
"A long time." Hayley said. "So Macy, where did you come from? What's your story?"
"Mav east, I guess. I met them at prom."
"So you're the new girl, I mean."
"New one? Uh, yeah. I guess." She answered. "They know, Julia?" She whispered.
"If you're not comfortable talking about it then don't talk about it."
"But you told them?"
"It's kind of understood. They just know."
"New girl implies that there was an old girl."
"You're not my first girl, Mace. You know that."
"You're not my first girl, either."
"Jess was Julia's first girl." Chess announced.
"You?" Macy asked Jess, sitting up a bit on the love seat.
"Yes. I was."
"She's the one you fell in love with?" Macy asked, looking at Jess a little more closely. They were nothing alike. Looks, personality, nothing compared.
"That would be me." Jess answered.
"Why did you break up?"
"She stole my boyfriend and married him." Jess replied sarcastically.
"Here we go." Jay mumbled.
"Look, why don't we leave the past in the past?" Kelly suggested.
"You think it would get out of hand, Kelly?" Julia asked.
"Leave the past where it belongs." Kelly replied. "It doesn't have anything to do with right here and now."
"Yes it does." Jay said to her.
"Cake and ice cream, Jayson." Tavin said, looking at his cards.
"We have more cake and ice cream. You guys want some?" Jess asked innocently.
"No, babe. Thanks." Jay laughed.
"Sure you don't want a slice of cake, Jay?" Tavin laughed.
"No, I don't." He answered.
"Jay, I can get you cake, babe." Jess offered.
"Would you like some cake, Jess?" Tavin asked. "It was good cake. The icing is sweet."
"It was sweet. Too sweet if you eat too much of it."
"You're right on that." Jay agreed. "That's what I like about ice cream, no matter how sweet it is, you can just keep eating. You don't want to spit it out."
"Oooh, Jay. Wow, man." Tavin laughed.
"Everyone shares the cake, takes a slice, but ice cream is so hard to share with other people." Jay added, keeping it going.
"We're not talking about cake and ice cream, are we?" Kelly asked Tavin. Tavin sensed her feelers coming out, so he slid her cup across the table to her and pointed at it. "Drink." Alcohol disconnected the feelers, withdrew them back into her brain.
Jess looked at the boys, understood where Kelly was going. She didn't have to be psychic to pick up on the tension between Jay and Tavin. Jess was drunk, but not too drunk to figure out who the cake was. It hit her suddenly and she felt weirded out by their quiet conversation. She read between the lines. She thought a moment, of her and Julia, of the room.
"Chess," Jess called, distracting him from his cards.
"What?" he asked, looking over his hand at her.
"The room, the door's always open. It never closed. Why didn't the door close, Chess?" Jess asked him.
"Why are you asking me?"
"Wow, Jess, where's that coming from?" Jay asked uncomfortably sober.
"Julia," Jess called, standing up. "Why?"
"Jess, girl, I think you're drunk." Chess told her, looking at Jayson.
"Jess, babe, the door's open. Do whatever you want." Julia told her.
"What room?" Hayley whispered to Tavin.
"Jesslyn," Chess called.
"Well, here we fucking go." Jay said, shaking his head.
"Why is the door open? Why do you keep this stirred up?" Jess asked.
"Oh my fucking God." Kelly said annoyed.
Julia separated from Macy and got off the love seat. She moved to the table, leaned over their poker game. "What am I stirring up exactly, Jesslyn? You brought it up, not me." Julia asked not sure whether to be angry or defiant or lure Jess in. "Or are you mad you can still be stirred up?"
"You'd like that wouldn't you?" Jess smiled, leaning closer to Julia.
"Just add vodka, Jess. You're that easy. You always were." Julia smiled. "Have you had enough vodka yet?" Julia asked, caressing her face, swiping her hair back over her ear, and letting her hand push the bathing suit strap off Jess's shoulder. "You want the door open, so you can get your boyfriend back? Or so you can have your girlfriend back? Or both? Wifey." Julia teased her and insulted her.
"Come on, Julia. Leave her alone. That's too far." Kelly said.
She looked to Jay.
"I see her." Jay groaned, sitting back in his chair. He was trying to put himself in that mindset of the first house, the room, the girls on each other. There were too many people in the basement. Hayley, Kevin. Ray even. Julia leaned closer, Jess let their mouths meet only for an instant. Julia flicked the bathing suit strap off her other shoulder and her top slid down, exposing Jess's chest.
"Why does she do this?" Kelly asked.
"Cause it feels good." Tavin answered.
"Chess, don't let her do this." Jay urged. He saw more to Julia than this side of her. He should have, he thought, back then. He should have, he thought, been the one to stop it before it started. Why didn't Chess care? About either of them? Wasn't he married to her?
Jay got up and separated Jess and Julia, dragging Jess away from Julia, covering her chest up. "No. No more, Jess. This is wrong." Jay said angrily. "She's your wife, Chess. Control her." Jay yelled, pulling Jesslyn away from Julia and away from the table.
"Get off me, Jayson." Jess whined.
"How am I the bad guy here?" Jay yelled at his drunk girlfriend. "Out, let's go." Jay said, picking her up and carting her away.
"Jay, put me down." She whined as he carried her out the door. Outside the basement door, he set her on her feet.
"I will not have another drunk whore for a girlfriend, Jess." He yelled.
"I thought it's what you wanted me to do."
"No, you weren't listening. Why would you even think that? Jess, think for yourself. You fucking girls, you're all crazy. Take your drunk ass home. Now." Jay yelled. "Before you do something that's going to piss me off more than I already am."
"What are you going to do? Have cake?"
"You are so lucky I love you right now."
"Jay, I'm sorry. I swear I wont do anything like that again. Baby, I thought-"
"You thought wrong." He yelled. "In there showing off what belongs to me. This creates problems, Jesslyn. Shit like this."
"I can't go home like this, Jay. My mom will fucking kill me."
"I'd rather have her kill you than this. You are not going back in there."
"Then neither are you." She said back.
"Come on. Upstairs then. We'll just go to bed upstairs. We're not done talking about this either. I am so mad right now, Jesslyn."
"Are you breaking up with me?"
"No." He answered, guiding her to the back patio. He slid the door open and sent her to the living room. Alex was still awake on the sofa.
"Can I go down to the party, Jay?" Alex asked. His innocent brown eyes looked up at him hopeful.
"You're not old enough. I'm not old enough." Jay stated flatly.
"Ok, never mind." He sighed, looking at Jess as Jay laid her on the couch. "Is she drunk?"
"Yeah." Jay answered, sitting on the end of the sofa by Jess's feet.
"Is that why you were fighting?"
"Yeah."
"Is that why you left the party?"
"Yes."
"Jay, I'm sorry." She said softly.
"What did you do?" Alex asked.
"I was kissing Julia." She answered.
"Jess, we're not talking right now, ok."
"I wanna fuck, Jayson." Jess giggled, alcohol fogging her mind.
"Shh, Jess. Stop."
"You don't wanna F her?" Alex asked.
"Alex, enough. Jess, Alex is in the room."
"He's too young to be in the fuck room." Jess laughed, slurring her speech.
"Jay, what's the fuck room?" Alex asked.
"There's no such thing, Alex." Jay hushed him. "Jess, come on. Please, stop. Just close your eyes and go to sleep. Pass out."
"I wannnnnaaa fuck, Jay."
"Alex, get outta here." Jay told him.
"You gonna F her?"
"Alex, please." Jay whispered. "Sometimes alcohol makes you say things you usually wouldn't."
Alex gathered up his iPad, charger and blanket and head upstairs. Jess moved on the couch and climbed atop Jay's lap. "Pull it out, Jay. I wanna fuck."
"You have to be quiet, Jess. We're upstairs. Could you just be quiet? You're gonna wake up Sandy and we don't want Sandy out here." He whispered.
"Ok," She whispered back. "I wanna sorry-fuck you." She giggled.
"I know, Jess."
"Shhh, ok." She giggled, sitting on his dick, rocking on him like he liked her to do. "That feels good, babe?" She asked.
"Yeah," He answered, holding her hips as she moved. Jess, drunk, was an annoyance. She was louder than usual, less inhibited. The entire time she rode him he had to keep her hushed and keep his eyes open for his brother's curious eyes and his ears open for foot steps from multiple areas. "Keep doing that, Jess. Keep going." He breathed hard. "Faster,"
"Jay-" She said, her voice shaky.
"Faster." He said, moving her waist for her, back and forth. "I'm almost there."
"Jay, I don't feel good." She said letting him shake her up, pulling her back and forth and holding her hips down on him as he thrust upward. Too much bouncing. Shaking her up like a soda with a lid on the bottle.
"I feel good, Jess. Fuck. I'm coming." He said.
As Jay came closer, she tried to move, pull off him, she felt it coming up. "Jay." She urged, covering her mouth. She tried to stop it, hold it in, back, somehow keep herself from letting it come out, but he wouldn't let go. He released inside of her and he felt the warmth all over him. Jess started vomiting and he didn't know whether to let her go or finish inside her.
"Jay," She said, her voice sounding weak.
"Just keep moving, I don't care." Jay whined, keeping her hips steady until he deposited every drop into her.
She hurled again. Then again. They were both covered in vomit. His shoulders, chest, abdomen. Hot stomach fluids and chunks of food all over him and her.
"Jess-"
"I couldn't help it and you wouldn't let go." She said, desperately searching for a way to get herself out of this mess.
"I love you, Jess." He said, thinking he should have shoved her across the room.
"Oh, Jay, we're covered in it." She laughed. "Eww, this is gross, baby."
"You can get off me now." He said.
"Did that turn you on?" She asked staying put on top of him. "Cause some people like that kind of thing. You know, like being peed on."
"Please don't piss on me. The vomit is enough." He replied.
"But did it turn you on?"
"No more than usual." He answered, pulling out of her. He pushed her back a little, making her stand up on her wobbly legs. Jess went in the kitchen, heading toward the paper towels.
"No, no, babe. We need a bath. Look at us." He said, redirecting her.
"My bag is downstairs." She said, thinking more clearly.
Vomiting always cleared her mind a bit. Had he known he would have stuck his fingers down her throat outside. Had he known he just would have taken her outside in the yard in the dark.
"I'll go." He said, opening the cellar door. No one will even think of touching me looking like this, he thought. He reeked of vomit. "It's me," Jay called, descending the steps to the basement. He didn't want to see what was even going on down there.
The lights were on, the music played low. He scanned the room for her bag, their phones. He wondered where Julia was? He found the bag, then went to the table for their phones. Kelly and Ray sat on the sofa, playing Mario brothers. "Jay, my God, what happened?" Kelly laughed, looking at him.
"Jess happened." He muttered, feeling cold and sticky.
Chess was fucking Macy, half covered on the love seat. Hayley sat with Kevin at the poker table, watching them across the room. His brother and Julia, though? He pushed that out of his mind, set it aside and grabbed their phones off the table. He had a shower to get and he had to clean up vomit.
Tavin and Julia were in the pool, laying on floats, drifting around on too much Xanax. They held hands, looked up at the night sky, the twinkling stars.
"We're so fucked up right now, Tav." Julia said.
"I'm numb." He added.
"We can't get fucked up like this. What if the zombies come and we are wasted?"
"We stay in the pool. Zoms can't swim."
"We'll die." Julia laughed. "Seriously though. We're fucked up. What a day. Got me taking my rings off." Julia said, splashing the water with her hands, spinning herself in circles. "You called me cake, made fun of me with Jayson. What kind of lover are you?"
"A good one."
"That was hot." She admitted. "Know why? Other than the obvious reasons?"
"Please, tell me."
"It didn't hurt."
"Well, my small dick feels special now." He laughed, kicking her float away from his.
"Jay was pissed wasn't he? His ice cream melted."
Tavin laughed. "More like had a melt down. Did you see her face when she told Mace you stole her boyfriend and married him?"
"Twice. I stole her boyfriend and married him twice."
"You did not think that through." He laughed. "Mace sure doesn't help the situation."
"He's got feelings for Macy, you know. I'm not a good wife anyway. I'm a better slut." She said, criticizing herself. "I see it and I know it when it happens that it's wrong and I should stop. But I'm a drunk whore girlfriend."
"Julia, stop it."
"And you're a drunk whore boyfriend."
"Kelly, she'll never forgive me."
"She doesn't know anything. Right now, neither of them do. They just think that we're huge drug addicts."
"And Assholes."
"That too."
"I need to get clean. I feel like shit." He confessed. "Start all over at the beginning. I wasted all that effort and time."
"Not a complete waste, Tavin. You slipped up. You can start over."
"You should too."
"We're fucked up."
"We are. Your float or mine, baby?" She laughed, paddling her float to the edge of the pool, she slid off and over the side of the pool.
"You leaving me, Jules?" He asked.
"Gotta pee." She said, letting the hot liquid run over her legs into the grass at her feet. "So, are we fucking or what?"
"We can." Tavin answered. "But we should go inside."
"Go inside and fuck?" She asked, splashing some water over the edge of the pool onto her pissy legs. "I don't think they'll go for that."
"If they only knew." Tavin said, sliding off his float into the water. He leaned on the edge of the pool.
"Come on. Let's go put the pieces back together." Julia said, backing away from the pool. She grabbed a towel.
Tavin hopped over the edge and she threw him one. "We could leave."
"And go where?" She gave him a blank stare.
"Julia, I own a fucking house." He said.
"How awkward would that be? Haven't we confused this enough for one liftime?"
"You're fucking scared. Why you so scared to admit that you shoulda been with me from the go?"
"Tavin, should I? Be with you? Is that what all this is about?"
"You've been avoiding it for years, Red. What is your fucking problem? All these people, these brothers and cousins and girls, it's all a fucking distraction. Julia, you honestly don't see it?"
"So we're supposed to walk in there and do what? What's the plan?"
"Julia, there's no fucking plan. Why do we need a plan?"
"Ok, so we walk in there. We say what?"
"What would you say? If you walked in there? Tell me."
"No."
"Why the fuck not? Julia, what would you say to him? To Kelly?"
"Tavin, stop it." She yelled.
"You're crying. Why are you crying?"
"Because."
"You've been denying this, us, for years. What would you go in there and tell Chess? Be honest. At least be honest with me." Tavin ordered. "What? What would you say?" He grabbed onto her hand, holding it to his chest. "Why are you crying?"
"I cant do this." Julia stammered.
"What would happen if you fucking did this? What would be so fucking bad about it? Julia, what's the truth? Tell me the truth."
"If I had left with you, I would have been dragged back here by my dad. I was too young and stupid and..."
"That's not good enough. That's making excuses, Julia."
Kelly and Ray came upstairs, having been tired from their long day and having become tired of the debauchery in the basement. Ray went up to bed and Kelly watched as Jay scrubbed up the living room, the couch with hot soapy water. Jess slept on the floor.
"Want some help?" Kelly asked as he scrubbed the carpet.
"Nah, it's my own fault. Shoulda known better." Jay mumbled.
"Jay, this is messed up." Kelly said.
"I know how you feel, Kell. Been there done that...when they fuck around and then...I just know." Jay said sadly. "Where are they?" He asked, crouching in front of her.
"In the pool. They're swimming." Kelly answered. "They're fucking around are they?" She asked.
"Kell, you know what I mean. Their lives, it's all fucking around. I wish you knew her before all this. She was a different person."
"That girl, Jay, you'll never have that girl from before all this."
"I know. It took a long time to realize it, though. I love Jess, and it's different with her."
"What am I gonna do with him? Jay-"
"I don't know. I know one thing, though. If I learned anything, it's draw that line that he can't cross and then go from there."
"He already crossed it."
"So, it's pretty simple, the answer." Jay shrugged, taking the water to the kitchen and dumping it down the drain.
Alex could be heard coming down the steps, into the kitchen. His face scrunched up. "Eww, it stinks like throw up." He complained.
"I know. I'm cleaning it up, Alex." Jay said. "What are you doing back down here?"
"They're fighting, Jayson." Alex said, coming downstairs. "They're outside and they're fighting."
"Who?"
"Julia and Tavin."
"Fist fighting or arguing?" He asked. He never knew anymore.
"Arguing. She's crying."
Kelly walked to the door with Jay and Alex.
"Shh, be quiet. Just listen for now." Jay said, going to the door. Alex was right. Jay slid the door open to the patio and he, Alex and Kelly listened in the darkness.
Chess lay with Macy, having pulled on his shorts and she pulled on her tee shirt. They talked and he held her when they heard the voices getting louder outside, coming through the basement door. Chess told her to stay put and squeezed through the basement door quietly. He watched them argue by the pool.
"What do you want me to say, Tavin? Tav, you mean to tell me you didn't fuck with my head?"
"Julia, why do we even do this? Why cant we leave each other alone? Why do you still fuck with me at all? Admit it, Julia. For Christ sakes, just admit it. You're fucking killing me. I asked you not to marry him."
"How many times do I have to say I love you? You're my friend. I can bring you anything. Every fucked up piece of me, every part of me. I lean on you. You are there when I need you. No question. You leave your life for me without me even asking. You sat by my bed and held my hand. You were scared when you thought I would die. You cried over me. You've laughed with me, at me. You make me strong when I am weak. You know the shit no one knows or is supposed to know. And I know your shit, all that shit no one should know. Go all the way back? To where? How far? When we were little and you kissed my cheek when I was crying on the playground? What point in time would you prefer? When I was paralyzed and you carried me? All the times I have cried on your shoulder and all the times you made me feel so much better? Safer? Stronger? Today? When I took my rings off for you? What do you want to hear?"
"And..."
"I need you more than you need me. So you stand there and ask me to tell the truth. That is the truth. There is no more truth."
"So why are you crying?"
"Why did you walk away in the first place? So you want me to fall apart over you now?"
"What do you want, Julia? You. Red, what do you want?" He asked, placing his hands on her shoulders, staring into her tear streaked face.
"We're going to hurt people, Tavin."
"We'll deal with it."
"What do you want to do? I am tired of waiting for you to say it-"
"You, stupid." She yelled. "So what? We walk away from here and-what?"
"We deal with it. We'll deal with it. Like we always do."
Jay put an arm around Kelly. "There's your answer." He whispered, pulling her into his arms. "It's going to be ok, Kelly. I swear, it's going to be ok." He reassured her. Jay felt nothing watching this happen, he'd moved past them and this, but he felt for Kelly. He could hear her crying.
Chess was fuming mad. Alex, Jay and Kelly watched as Chess went to them in the yard. He didn't do the expected, despite his anger, despite his desire to beat them both to their graves. He took Julia's hand, removed her rings. "Go." He said.
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